Saturday, October 1, 2011

letting people down

one of my greatest weakness is that, i'm afraid of letting people down till sometimes that i could destroy myself...
it was so hard for me to send a text asking if i could pull out...
anyone of you has ever felt that way?
like it so hard to let people down that you rather just sacrifice your own interests?

what made me write this little post is that
i've applied for a post as a rexco member and had recently been approved...
you see, when my friends applied, i wanted to apply too
i did not think of the responsibilities and the time i'll have to sacrifice if i got in...
when my friends got in and my text came in late, i didn't feel so good like as though i'm not good enough...
but when the text came, i was happy for a minute till i began to think of all the personal time and interest i'll have to sacrifice and i began to regret that i applied...
i've sent a text yesterday asking if i could pull out...
the exco member asked me why and i've explained (in a text)
but i havent got a reply yet...
though i know that i have the right to pull out, i find it hard to send that text yesterday cos it kills me if i had to let people down...
since at a very young age, it matters to me what people think of me (another bad habit) to the point that it's hard for me to be true to myself and express my real thoughts and feelings in order not to jeopardize my relationship with that person....
can i ever be truly happy and true to myself if i keep on thinking of what people think that it kills me to the core???
HELP!!!

-but then again, i'm very good at letting people down unintentionally...
i'm a failure to myself a lot of times...-

Sunday, September 25, 2011

I got assignments on my mind~~~

assignments....
i thought i wont dread it but i am...
they're not easy and you have to do a lot for so little marks...
and you'll have to rush for time and battle laziness...
need will power!!!

-sorry if this post contains too many grammatical errors and inaccurate choice of words... i'm just tired and too lazy to think

Wednesday, September 21, 2011

it's been too long since i last blogged...
there were just too many things going around...
or, i'm just plain lazy...
either...or....

these past few months, I've:
-joined National Service in Kem Tanjung Semarak, Pekan, Pahang...
-faff around
- ENTERED UNIVERSITY!!!!

now, i'm in my second week of university and it's kinda fun in a way...
it's just that, i'm in a town town...
not a city town...
there's nothing much here and the next big town with malls and stuff are like an hour away...
not too far though but it's kinda tiring to drive an hour just to shop...
but then again, i'll be going back every week (or so), so it wont be such a problem...
we've just got our Jaring account...
which means that i could go online more often now...WHEE!!!!
hmmmm.... there's just so much to tell but i dont feel like talking to just another computer...
so i guess i'll just stop....
BYE!

Monday, May 9, 2011

how did Doc Don Dogoier (Green) turn from this

to this (below) in two episodes?


Friday, May 6, 2011

Back to December (Male Response Cover)

i just wrote (changed the lyrics a little) for a Male Response to Taylor Swift's Back to December...
now, if only i could pick up the guts to sing it...
found the instrumental... but i cant find my guts...
anyways, here are the lyrics, whoever want to do it....

Back to December (Male Response Cover)

I'm so glad I finally see you
I’m fine, they’re doing great too
They’ve asked about you for a while

And you too, busier than ever
We small talk, work and the weather
My guard is up, and you know why

Because the last time I saw you
Still burns at the back of my mind
I gave you roses, but you left them there to die

But here I am, swallowing my pride
Standing in front of you, saying it’s gonna be alright
And I'd go back to December any time
It turns out freedom ain't nothing but missing you
Wishing I'd realized I should have never let you go
I'd go back to December, turn around and make it alright
I'd go back to December any time


These days, I haven't been sleeping
Staying up, thinking the day you left me
When my birthday passed, and you didn't call

Then I think about summer, all the beautiful times
I watched you laughing from the driver’s side
And realized I love you even more

And then the cold came, the dark days
When fear crept into your mind
I gave you all my love, and all you gave me was goodbye

But here I am, swallowing my pride
Standing in front of you, saying it’s gonna be alright
And I'd go back to December any time
It turns out freedom ain't nothing but missing you
Wishing I'd realized I should have never let you go
I'd go back to December, turn around and change my own mind
I'd go back to December any time

I miss your dark hair, your sweet smile
So good to me, so right
And how you held me so tightly that September night
The first time I ever saw you cry
Maybe this is wishful thinking
Probably mindless dreaming
But if we loved again, I swear I’d hold you tight
I'd go back in time and change it, but I can't
So if this is so darn awkward now, I understand

So here I am, swallowing my pride
Standing in front of you, saying it’s gonna be alright
And I'd go back to December
It turns out freedom ain't nothing but missing you
Wishing I'd realized I should have never let you go
I'd go back to December, turn around and make it alright
I'd go back to December, turn around and change my own mind
Let’s go back to December soon after all this time, all this time

Tuesday, April 12, 2011

ask me anything...

this is really a chance in a lifetime (sorta)
i'm opening a Q & A session for anyone who reads my blog for the next few hours (this is a privilege for bloggers cos i only offered an hour on other sites...
so come on,
ask me anything and i'll answer it for the next 10 hours...
closing time would be 12.00am of 13th April 2011
limited to only one question per person...
so, ask me what's really on your mind...




Friday, April 1, 2011

and so it happened

this is a true story... it happened yesterday night... late at night, i heard a knock at my door.... you might not find this weird but, you might not know this... i live alone.... oh kay... tbh, i was a little creeped out but when i heard a jingle, i knew it was my mum... but, why was she back? she was back with my sister... they were worried sick... you see, they called me and messaged me many times but i didn't answer.... turns out, i left my cellphone in my car... (kinda funny) you see, i was supposed to call my mum every night when i reach home after work... i thought about it and the thought became, i thought i already did (for some odd reason)... and then, i got a bit of a lecture... and my mum said, "it's not even 12 yet, and you already did this..." it was unintentional... i really forgot that i left my cellphone in the car.... -the end- so, you can get on with you amazing life now...

Thursday, March 31, 2011

last blog of the month

so, today is the 31st of March...
this would be the last blog of this month i guess...
if you've noticed, i've not been blogging much lately due not having enough time or idea to blog...
i was busy this month...
its the 1st semester thing, where there are exams and marking of papers as well as report writing...
other than that, the lack of internet at home prevents me from blogging in my free time...

.............. (~~)
i'll think of something to blog that will be worth your time....
bye...

Monday, February 14, 2011

since nobody reads this anyways....

since nobody read this anyways, and i just wanna let it out, i'll just put this here...
i'll share this since it's valentines....
i noticed a trend of my crush chases...
my sign of "Fine, i'll stop chasing you and wasting your precious time" is actually by giving them a present...which actually could mean a forked road...
depending on the after that, but they never fall to my favor...NEVER...

my first crush, i gave her a lollipop....
second one, a pair of earrings
and the third and last so far, i gave her a piece of cake and a puppy soft toy for her birthday...

and that is the story of my failures....

Friday, February 11, 2011

header change?

with the release of new awkward plushies by Wong Fu, i guess i wanna change my header too....
but i'm a bit busy lately...
so, stay tuned for a new header soon...

#totallyrandom

Thursday, February 10, 2011

what i did recently...

well, if you haven't already know, Wednesdays are like my DAY off...
so, yesterday, i went down town to Bukit Bintang... which is part of the Golden Triangle of Kuala Lumpur...
i guess i walked all day and only sat in the train and during my desert break which i will tell you more about it soon...

memorable stuff....
1.i finally got my 1Tb external hard drive after wanting for it for a few months... after hours of surveying and asking, i finally got a WD Element 1Tb for RM 315 which original price is RM329... "is!" you might ask... yea, is... cos the shop is actually having promotion now...so, no need to bargain... but i'm uncertain when they will revert back to the original price... that was in Low Yat Plaza...

2.due to curiosity and time, i went for this prehistoric exhibition in Time Square...
i have my student card with me so entrance was only RM10...
it was nice and "educational"... but you have to be toured around, cant go in alone...
i was the only customer so it was kinda like a personal tour but then again, i dont usually make friends easily so i did not make a new friend...

3. i finally tasted macaroons at Godiva, Pavillion... it was kinda pricey at RM15 for 2 pieces...
it was nice and sweet...

4. i found Gosei Ground DX in a shop in Time Square but it was RM400... too pricey... but then again, i'll probably check ebay first...

what else???? i guess that's most of it for yesterday...

this morning, i woke up with a sore throat...
i left my air con on after the off timer time and thus, it was on till i woke up...
lack of water, and air con caused me to have a sore throat...
so i went out to get lemon...
i also went and get marble cake and dessicated coconut and made lamingtons with them
(i bought chocolate yesterday....)
i've never tried the real thing so i dont know how it should taste like but, oh well...

thats all for now... ttyl? no? it's okay i guess.... i'm used to it...

Thursday, January 27, 2011

cant wait for February... kinda...

i cant wait for February... kinda... maybe... i dunno... i'm confused...
line up of February that i'm looking forward to...

1. Chinese New Year!!! GONG XI GONG XI... i would like to wish all Chinese around the world a Happy Chinese New Year especially to all my friends and my favorite Youtube people Phil, Wes and Ted of Wong Fu and Kevin and dad of Kevjumba and also Harry Shum Jr. Have an awesome Year of the Rabbit... and make more awesome videos...

2. Power Rangers Samurai is premiering in February!!! cant wait... after one whole year of no Power Rangers, they're finally back with their rightful owner, Saban....

3. Glee would be back...YAY!!!!!

Tuesday, January 25, 2011

Script? Who wants to help me film?

Dark Rainy Daze
Setting: Cafe, Raining heavily outside, Evening

Scene 1
A girl sitting by the window sipping on coffee, looking outside

Monologue: Today was the day he left me. He left me without a goodbye. He went away with her, far far away. The rain, oh the rain, you bring me such peace on this dreadful day. Oh, you mug of coffee, your kiss brings me comfort and oh chair, your sturdiness gives me support. It's like you guys are the only ones that understand my feeling now.

Scene 2
An office guy sitting at a corner, staring blankly onto a piece of paper.

Monologue: Today was the day I left my job. Or rather, my job left me. Goodbye financial security. And in this time and age, where can i find a good job. What did I do? What WILL I do? Would this be my last cup of good coffee? Would this be my last time wearing this necktie? Would this be the last time I actually even get to wear a necktie? Will all my Armani's lay in the closet, waiting for the day when i finally have a garage sale?

Scene 3
The rain finally stops. The girl looks outside and saw a rainbow. The guy looked up and saw the rainbow too. A little smile emerges from the girls face. She silently giggled a little as though she remembers something funny. The guy lifted his hand to call for the bill. The waiter came and the guy paid for his cup of coffee. He then walked over to the door. He looked at the girl and the girl looked back at him and they both smiled.

Scene 4
The words "There will always going to be a better tomorrow."

The end

Thursday, January 13, 2011

Changes.

hey guys...
it's been so long since i blogged...
i've been busy...
too many changes going on in my life (kinda)
i'm now a working person...
(whew, at least now i have my parents off my back on finding a job)
and i'm also living by myself in my old place...
things are busy...
but when i finish work, i get lonely when i get back to the house
cant call it a home cos my family is not there...
but, guess who accompanied me yesterday....
i was accompanied by Leonardo diCaprio and Tom Hanks...
haha...
i watched "Catch me if you can" on tv last night when i got back from work...
TV? really?
yea, i'm that lame...
oh, i haven't told you guys why tv...
its cos i dont have internet there...
i'm currently in my "office" waiting for other colleagues and students to start class...
that will be in like about an hour's time...
and i'm too lazy to go downstairs to eat while i wait... sigh...
i'm really lame...

i bet there has been a lot of changes for my parent too...
none of us 3 are at home during the day and Jeremy has now gone to the US (lucky person)...
sigh....

i'm hungry...
*random