i'm sorry

i'm sorry i've been acting weird lately

(some friends: really?! no la! you were fine)

but i was acting weirdly... you guys just didnt take the time to notice (cos you're too busy with your own lives that was shooting up while mine was going through a downward spiral)

(sorry, that only implied to some "friends")

so, yea...

i've been acting weirdly and i apologize for it...

i've been rather down lately...

been putting a lot of pressure on myself till i've come to terms with the fact that i'm actually stupid...

i cant do simple math equations that i could do in seconds last time... i just forgot how to do them already...

this took a toll on me as i've checked my blood pressure these days and found that its pretty high...

i feel so stupid now....

contemplated dying but what difference does it make....

if it does not make any difference whether i'm dead or alive, might as well live...

at least i'll still have a shot of going to heaven when i die (naturally)

exams are drawing near...

i STILL dont know what to do...

i STILL cant find my purpose in life...

i STILL dont know what's in store next...

i NEED GOD to tell me...

i NEED GOD to reaffirm me...

i NEED peace....